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I sneaked into the kitchen in the middle of the night
And I found a chocolate cake and I cut it with a knife
Twelve pieces I did cut. Eleven of them I ate
And one by one, there was almost none left upon the plate

But before I finished eating, I saved a little slice
To give to my baby brother, 'cause I am very nice
I crawled back upstairs and got my brother out of bed
And quietly I whispered and this is what I said

As we walked real quiet down the bedroom stairs
With Tommy sucking his thumb and hugging his teddy bear
I said "Quick, quick Tommy, look what I found!
Shhhhh! Be quiet and quickly gulp it down."

Just then we heard a thump and a clumpity clump clump clump
We knew it was our mommy and in the darkness we all bumped

Then the lights came on and I heard her say
"Blah blah blah blah," in her special "blah blah" way

"Who finished up the cake? Who's the rotten kid?"
And since Tommy had the last piece, I said, "He did!"
She looked at him and saw that his face was full of crumbs
With chocolate flavored icing on his nose and on his thumbs

I went back upstairs as my mother yelled some more
"Blah blah blah blah" just like before
But I knew it wasn't right; Tom was just a kid;
So I told her that the cake was eaten by my Uncle Sid

Mommy looked surprised. Then her face turned red
And I bet you know exactly what she said
She said, "Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah
Blah blah blah blah blah!"