Are you cool?
Well I'm cool
Is everybody cool?
Well let's get hot

Grass roots
All across this great nation
And I am truly humbled
And gratefully accept the nomination

I'm gonna be President
Of the United States
First Tuesday in November
Mark it down and save the date

Live music in the White House
Strictly B.Y.O.B.
The public wanna get down
And it's our collective destiny

I'm gonna kiss all the babies
Maybe kiss their Mamas too
I don't need the secret service
I know how to work a room

I'm gonna be President
Of the United States
I was born to be the President
Of these United States

On the day I was born
All the nurses and doctors
Take that boy out his crib
And put him in, the Executive Office

First thing that I'm gonna do
Is disclose all those UFOs
Put Jimi Hendrix on the twenty dollar bill
And Bill Hicks on a five note

Hot damn, the democratic process
What a time to be alive
Oh I'm ready to give the people what they want
And what they want is straight talk and no jive

We have exit polls comin' in
Rhode Island and American Samoa
We have more results comin' in
From Puerto Rico and both Dakotas

Breaking news, happening right now
I believe we're ready to call it
Do you want us to call it? Yeah
I believe we have a winner

Thank you very much
I couldn't have done it
I couldn't have done it without you
Drinks on me

Thank you very much
I couldn't have done it
I couldn't have done it without you
Drinks on me

First thing that I'm gonna do
Is go for a ride on a UFO
Put Jimi Hendrix on the twenty dollar bill
And Bill Hicks on a five note

Hot damn, the democratic process
What a time to be alive
Oh I'm ready to give the people what they want
And what they want is straight talk and no jive