Lord, I smoked 100 cigarettes
Waiting on your call but it ain't come yet
I'm waiting for your footsteps in my hall
And I'm watching for this ash to fall

And while I'm counting my regrets
I'm gonna smoke 100 cigarettes
You know how I'm feeling?

My porch light is on and I've unlocked my door
My eyes are red and my throat is sore
I check my mail and watch my phone
And I wonder when you're coming home

And while I'm counting my regrets
I'm gonna smoke 100 cigarettes

Yes, I smoked 100 cigarettes
Waiting for your call but it ain't come yet
I'm waiting on your footsteps in my hall
And I'm watching for this ash to fall

While I'm counting my regrets
I'm gonna smoke 100 cigarettes

You know, right about that time
My friend who, Mr Chilly call me up at this telephone
This what he said

How much longer can I watch my own TV?
Now that I've seen how white my shirts can be
One more smoke, I'll take just one more sip
Before I wipe your name right off my lips

While I'm counting my regrets
I'm gonna smoke 100 cigarettes

Lord, I smoked 100 cigarettes
Waiting for your call but it ain't come yet
I'm still waiting on your footsteps in my hall
And I'm watching for this ash to fall

And while I'm counting my regrets
I'm gonna smoke 100 cigarettes
And while I'm counting my regrets
I'm gonna smoke 100 cigarettes

Before I see the rising sun
I believe I'll smoke 101